June 15, 2008 - It's just an hobby.
We are doing a bit of traveling today. Traveling to a far-off land that I have never been to. The Bronx. El's grandmother grew up there and this weekend she and El's parents came up to see her old neighborhood. OK, so I lied, I've been to the Bronx zoo. But that doesn't really count! I plan on bringing my camera up to see if I can shoot a few pitcures of this so close, yet so far away from me, part of the city I live in.
It's interesting how when I shoot, I often have aspirations of putting my work in a museum or finding a niche in some magazine, yet somehow I get almost as much satisfaction by hanging the photos on my living room wall. They don't get a whole lot of attention sitting, collecting dust, above our couch. But maybe that's all I really want them for. A quiet and unobstrusive collections of moments that I thought were worth saving for future reference.
So if I capture a really nice shot up in the Bronx today, where will it end up? Hanging in my apartment? It makes me wonder why I spent 4 years studying photography in school, why I spend money on camera equipment, all for a "hobby?" I don't even like the word "hobby." Calling it a hobby makes it seem so private, so closed-in. Maybe I'm afraid of being criticized or rejected by submitting it to museums or magazines, it's always appreciated by the people who see it on our walls. But there's still this part of me that wishes I had the nerve to say "hell with what people think!" and march into a sleek SoHo gallery and land myself a show. I've got friends who do it. Why can't I?
I must resolve to be more proactive in this project! Maybe by posting my work here, to start, I can get the encouragement, or at least the nerve, to consider the idea of people outside of my living room enjoying my work. After all, I spend so much time and energy perfecting it, it's got to be worth more than being suited to collect dust for all eternity.